Hey everyone!
So today I'm going to tell you about the time I ruined a party in the most awkward way. This happened just the other night. We had a few friends over for some games and good times. It was kind of late at night (and for us late is like 11:30, living it up!) and we were all just sitting around sharing jokes. Now the kind of jokes we enjoy are the anti-jokes, kind of stupid but totally hilarious.
We were all laughing our heads off (not literally, but pretty darn close!) at the jokes we liked when we started talking about the kind of jokes we don't like, dead baby jokes being everyone's least favorite. A Holocaust joke was mentioned and up to this point the atmosphere had been light hearted and rather enjoyable. Until I happened. Me and my big mouth have a way of killing the mood. For some inexplicable reason I thought it would be a good idea to mention this picture I had seen floating around the internet. The picture was of the inside of a gas chamber at a concentration camp, and on the walls there were scratch marks from the people trapped inside. See, now even you, dear reader, feel uncomfortable. You can only imagine how the atmosphere was like. The awkwardness was palpable. You could cut it with a knife. Crickets could be heard chirping in the background.
Congratulations Bindi, you've done it again!
Lesson learned, there is no better way to kill a party than the Holocaust.
Dearly yours,
Bindi.
Saturday, November 23, 2013
Thursday, November 21, 2013
The perfect guy
Hey Y'all!
Yes i did just title this one, The perfect guy. As you all know, we are not very good with guys. I believe that i can be decent with them at time. i just have my few moments where i have to shake my head, and say why?? where did that come from?? But don't we all? alright, so there's this guy that comes into my sandwich shop occasionally. super attractive. He has come in a lot and we talk all the time. Like long awesome conversations!! its awesome!! well this time he came in and he was wearing glasses. oh my heavens!! sooooo attractive. of course i am sooo flustered by his attractiveness. so instead of our usual conversation that we have. i just stared at him. just standing there smiling like an idiot. i could not say two words to him! ahh! it was horrible!! hopefully he wasn't too freaked out by my awkward staring and smiling.
wish me luck!
Lots of love!
Bangles!
Yes i did just title this one, The perfect guy. As you all know, we are not very good with guys. I believe that i can be decent with them at time. i just have my few moments where i have to shake my head, and say why?? where did that come from?? But don't we all? alright, so there's this guy that comes into my sandwich shop occasionally. super attractive. He has come in a lot and we talk all the time. Like long awesome conversations!! its awesome!! well this time he came in and he was wearing glasses. oh my heavens!! sooooo attractive. of course i am sooo flustered by his attractiveness. so instead of our usual conversation that we have. i just stared at him. just standing there smiling like an idiot. i could not say two words to him! ahh! it was horrible!! hopefully he wasn't too freaked out by my awkward staring and smiling.
wish me luck!
Lots of love!
Bangles!
Wednesday, November 20, 2013
Priscilla and Guy chapter one
So I have this roommate, not Bindi or Bangles, but another one named Priscilla. (We may have been a bit misleading as Bindi and Bangles are not technically my roommates as they are my housemates. We live in a house apartment, they are downstairs and I am upstairs with Priscilla and a Canadian so you can imagine how often I hang out up there.) Priscilla is super introverted and really shy. And therefore a tad bit awkward. But not the awkward like us. Ya know how we laugh at ourselves and make fun of each other.... ya not like that at all. So her and her boyfriend Guy, AWKWARD. And me being the most awkward of them all doesn't help the situation.
One day Bindi and I were heading upstairs to my kitchen to get ingredients to make a pizza. Who doesn't love pizza!? Crazy people that's who. Definitely not Bindi and myself. So we were walking upstairs and we hear Priscilla and Guy. Insert minor panic attack. Honestly, that's how I feel when I see them. They were in the kitchen, I looked at Bindi with panic in my eye encouraging her to get ME OUTTA HERE.
Never fear Bindi is here! What does she do, starts the most uncomfortable conversation we have ever. Ever. Had. You should know Bindi and I (quite surprisingly) were never awkward together. Ever. We hit it off from the beginning, so you can imagine how awkward it must have been for us to have an "awkward" conversation. It was almost scripted. Like we rehearsed it before, which is totally something we would do. And they just stood there. Looking at us. Awkward. Ya.... Steer clear of Guy and Priscilla. More adventures to come.
Yours truly,
Maaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggooooooooooooooo
One day Bindi and I were heading upstairs to my kitchen to get ingredients to make a pizza. Who doesn't love pizza!? Crazy people that's who. Definitely not Bindi and myself. So we were walking upstairs and we hear Priscilla and Guy. Insert minor panic attack. Honestly, that's how I feel when I see them. They were in the kitchen, I looked at Bindi with panic in my eye encouraging her to get ME OUTTA HERE.
Never fear Bindi is here! What does she do, starts the most uncomfortable conversation we have ever. Ever. Had. You should know Bindi and I (quite surprisingly) were never awkward together. Ever. We hit it off from the beginning, so you can imagine how awkward it must have been for us to have an "awkward" conversation. It was almost scripted. Like we rehearsed it before, which is totally something we would do. And they just stood there. Looking at us. Awkward. Ya.... Steer clear of Guy and Priscilla. More adventures to come.
Yours truly,
Maaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggooooooooooooooo
Tuesday, November 19, 2013
Awkward Lester Encounter
It's that time again! Here's another installment in the tales of Lester.
So one fine day a few weeks ago I was walking to campus on my way to class. I had my head phones in and was taking my usual shortcut through a parking lot when I hear a car pull up behind me. My first thought is "Man this car has pulled up kinda close, I mean I'm short but not invisible." I was thinking that maybe they just wanted to park in the vacated spot I was currently walking through. That was not their intentions at all. Suddenly I hear someone call out my name. "Bindi!" I froze, who could possibly know my name in this, the most random of places? You guessed it! Lester! Blech. I turn around and see him trying to be cool with his window down and sunglasses on. I give him a complimentary half wave and turn to go on my merry little way. Lester was having none of that. "Hey Bindi! Hop in I'll give you a lift!" he calls out to me. My instincts tell me to run, to get out and leave Lester far behind me. But the next thing I know I'M FREAKING SITTING IN HIS CAR!!!! WHAT THE H E DOUBLE HOCKEY STICKS WAS I THINKING?!?! I didn't know what to do! He totally caught me off guard and I didn't have an excuse ready so I get in! Believe me, there is nothing you could say to me that would make me feel any worse. I'm very ashamed with myself at this point. Then he tells me that he had been on his way to the grocery store when he saw me walking and decided to turn around and follow me, then pick me up. AAAAHHHHH!!!!! CREEP CREEP CREEP! Let's just say it was the most uncomfortable 2 minute car ride I have ever been on. I feel dirty, absolutely dirty. I am NEVER getting back into that man's car. Ever. Not even if I were being chased by a pack of brain-hungry zombies and his was the only car still working. I would rather join the legion of the undead.
This will not be the last you hear of Lester! There are still many encounters that I've been saving up just for you!
Dearly yours, Bindi.
So one fine day a few weeks ago I was walking to campus on my way to class. I had my head phones in and was taking my usual shortcut through a parking lot when I hear a car pull up behind me. My first thought is "Man this car has pulled up kinda close, I mean I'm short but not invisible." I was thinking that maybe they just wanted to park in the vacated spot I was currently walking through. That was not their intentions at all. Suddenly I hear someone call out my name. "Bindi!" I froze, who could possibly know my name in this, the most random of places? You guessed it! Lester! Blech. I turn around and see him trying to be cool with his window down and sunglasses on. I give him a complimentary half wave and turn to go on my merry little way. Lester was having none of that. "Hey Bindi! Hop in I'll give you a lift!" he calls out to me. My instincts tell me to run, to get out and leave Lester far behind me. But the next thing I know I'M FREAKING SITTING IN HIS CAR!!!! WHAT THE H E DOUBLE HOCKEY STICKS WAS I THINKING?!?! I didn't know what to do! He totally caught me off guard and I didn't have an excuse ready so I get in! Believe me, there is nothing you could say to me that would make me feel any worse. I'm very ashamed with myself at this point. Then he tells me that he had been on his way to the grocery store when he saw me walking and decided to turn around and follow me, then pick me up. AAAAHHHHH!!!!! CREEP CREEP CREEP! Let's just say it was the most uncomfortable 2 minute car ride I have ever been on. I feel dirty, absolutely dirty. I am NEVER getting back into that man's car. Ever. Not even if I were being chased by a pack of brain-hungry zombies and his was the only car still working. I would rather join the legion of the undead.
This will not be the last you hear of Lester! There are still many encounters that I've been saving up just for you!
Dearly yours, Bindi.
Sunday, November 17, 2013
Horrible with Numbers
Hey Y'all!!
If you guys didn't know, i am horrible with numbers. It is not a strength of mine. as we (we as in Bindi and I) were walking back to our house, when i proudly announced that i was going to be a half decade old. as everyone knows a half decade is 5 years. i proudly announced that i was going to be 5 years old. When i really meant was i am going to be 2 decades old. Yes that is me in a hunch. i am horrible at math and proud of it. :)
Lots of love!!
Bangles!
If you guys didn't know, i am horrible with numbers. It is not a strength of mine. as we (we as in Bindi and I) were walking back to our house, when i proudly announced that i was going to be a half decade old. as everyone knows a half decade is 5 years. i proudly announced that i was going to be 5 years old. When i really meant was i am going to be 2 decades old. Yes that is me in a hunch. i am horrible at math and proud of it. :)
Lots of love!!
Bangles!
Saturday, November 16, 2013
Friday, November 15, 2013
Hockey Times
So sporting events... not our thing. Here's the thing, I love hockey! Like more than life but crowds I'm a little less fond of. Only because of my lack of people skills. So tonight Margo and I dragged ourselves (almost literally) out of the house to attend a game. We should have stayed in bed. Our lack of social skills came out to play tonight!
Awkward situation #1: The concession stand.
We decided we were feeling peckish and felt we deserved a nice treat after a long week so we head on over to the concession stand for some soft pretzels and cheese. As the girl was counting out the change we were waiting for the order and one of the workers gets some nachos ready and holds them out to us obviously trying to give them to us. Having not ordered nachos we were not expecting them and therefore did not take them. So we just stood there, staring at her as if we had never seen such a thing. Until finally she says "Are these not yours?". We just awkwardly replied "No... we had pretzels" then we put our heads down in shame and waited for our appropriate food.
Awkward situation #2: Margo and the drinking fountain.
Apparently salted pretzels and cheese make one thirsty. Whilst I was sipping from the fountain Margo had a lovely encounter of her own. A boy (14 or 15 ish) approached. He was wrapped in a blanket (understandable, hockey games are somewhat chilly) so Margo gave him a complimentary chuckle and then proceeded to spin out of his way. Yes ladies and gentlemen, spin. I made her reenact this for me once we got home, it was lovely.
Awkward situation #3: The cell phone drop.
So I'm a klutz. Kind of common knowledge. And tonight was no exception. I pulled out my phone and it immediately jumped out of my hands and onto the floor. Instead of acting normal about it I screamed. (I should let you know that I am a screamer. All the time, at anything. I believe Bangles mentioned that in her post about our TV show watching) Anyways, I drop my phone, scream, and everyone in the near vicinity looks at me as I reach down to pick it up, giggling and red in the face.
At that my friends is why we try to keep our time spent out in public to a minimum.
Dearly yours, Bindi
p.s. (Margo here) Bindi and myself do some major, major crushing on the Zamboni driver whom we affectionately named Pablo. (His name is obvious Pablo, not something realistic like Zach... psh...) anyways he is the reason I go to the games. Pablo is a solid 8.5, Pablo with glasses is easily a ten. Thanks for failing that eye test Pablo. ;)
Yours truly,
Margo
Awkward situation #1: The concession stand.
We decided we were feeling peckish and felt we deserved a nice treat after a long week so we head on over to the concession stand for some soft pretzels and cheese. As the girl was counting out the change we were waiting for the order and one of the workers gets some nachos ready and holds them out to us obviously trying to give them to us. Having not ordered nachos we were not expecting them and therefore did not take them. So we just stood there, staring at her as if we had never seen such a thing. Until finally she says "Are these not yours?". We just awkwardly replied "No... we had pretzels" then we put our heads down in shame and waited for our appropriate food.
Awkward situation #2: Margo and the drinking fountain.
Apparently salted pretzels and cheese make one thirsty. Whilst I was sipping from the fountain Margo had a lovely encounter of her own. A boy (14 or 15 ish) approached. He was wrapped in a blanket (understandable, hockey games are somewhat chilly) so Margo gave him a complimentary chuckle and then proceeded to spin out of his way. Yes ladies and gentlemen, spin. I made her reenact this for me once we got home, it was lovely.
Awkward situation #3: The cell phone drop.
So I'm a klutz. Kind of common knowledge. And tonight was no exception. I pulled out my phone and it immediately jumped out of my hands and onto the floor. Instead of acting normal about it I screamed. (I should let you know that I am a screamer. All the time, at anything. I believe Bangles mentioned that in her post about our TV show watching) Anyways, I drop my phone, scream, and everyone in the near vicinity looks at me as I reach down to pick it up, giggling and red in the face.
At that my friends is why we try to keep our time spent out in public to a minimum.
Dearly yours, Bindi
p.s. (Margo here) Bindi and myself do some major, major crushing on the Zamboni driver whom we affectionately named Pablo. (His name is obvious Pablo, not something realistic like Zach... psh...) anyways he is the reason I go to the games. Pablo is a solid 8.5, Pablo with glasses is easily a ten. Thanks for failing that eye test Pablo. ;)
Yours truly,
Margo
Snow Days
Hey Y'all!!
so today has been a snow day. it has been snowing all day. Snow day in my terms means don't leave the house. ever. haha but that's a lie. i went to the gym. haha awkward moment of the day. So my siblings go to preschool at the gym i work out with, so i was staring at them through a giant window, just standing at the window smiling at all these 4 year olds. I pretty sure people thought i was creepy. but they looked so happy and i miss them. i promise im not a creeper. 2nd story of the day! back to snow day. so we don't leave our house when its cold outside, so we are addicted to this T.V. show called Chuck. Heard of it? yeah its awesome! well we just spent 3 hours watching chuck. Bindi jumps at everything, and i mean everything. it follows by screams of joy and confusion. if you never need some entertainment. come watch chuck with us or even Psych which is our first favorite T.V. show ever!
Lots of Love!
Bangles!
so today has been a snow day. it has been snowing all day. Snow day in my terms means don't leave the house. ever. haha but that's a lie. i went to the gym. haha awkward moment of the day. So my siblings go to preschool at the gym i work out with, so i was staring at them through a giant window, just standing at the window smiling at all these 4 year olds. I pretty sure people thought i was creepy. but they looked so happy and i miss them. i promise im not a creeper. 2nd story of the day! back to snow day. so we don't leave our house when its cold outside, so we are addicted to this T.V. show called Chuck. Heard of it? yeah its awesome! well we just spent 3 hours watching chuck. Bindi jumps at everything, and i mean everything. it follows by screams of joy and confusion. if you never need some entertainment. come watch chuck with us or even Psych which is our first favorite T.V. show ever!
Lots of Love!
Bangles!
Awkward Lester Encounter
Bindi present! So I think it's time I told you all the story of Lester.
*Sigh* Lester, Lester, Lester. Ew. He lives in my neighborhood, goes to my church and can not for the life of him take a hint. He will not leave me alone and it's totally creepy. This guy comes across mildly stalkerish. I'm sure he's a nice guy and I give him points for trying but he is fighting a loosing battle. I'm flattered that he's interested, really I am, but every encounter I have with him is... well for lack of a better word awkward. There are many stories and I don't want to share them all now but we'll start from the beginning. Bangles and I were walking home from a church activity and Lester catches up with us and starts to make casual conversation. At this point I did not yet know of his creepiness so I was alright with just chatting with him. But then as we near his apartment he insist (rather eagerly) that we come inside for a slice of his homemade bread. He would not take no for an answer and so reluctantly Bangles and I go in. The bread was alright, my grandma makes it better, but the overall atmosphere there was so uncomfortable. Trust me we did not stay long. We got out as soon as we could. Later on Bangles informed me that he did not say two words to her and he only had eyes for me, something that I had not noticed at the time but now it makes perfect sense. This man is creepy and I get the willies every time he is mentioned. Well that is all I have for this installment, but never fear! There are PLENTY of Awkward Lester Encounters to come!
Dearly Yours, Bindi!
Thursday, November 14, 2013
Guest Blogger
Hey Yall!
I am the celebrity guest blogger for the evening. Just like my friends, I also have an exciting life full of many awkward adventures! In my spare time I love to creep in windows and go Facebook stalking.... ok I am totally kidding about that... or am I?... Anyways for now let's just say that my name is Kel. I am pretty much the coolest guy that will ever be writing on this blog (because I am the only guy writing on this blog) so hopefully I can provide some comic relief from a male perspective as well! Anyways thank you for reading and I hope that you enjoy our many great adventures!
Kel
I am the celebrity guest blogger for the evening. Just like my friends, I also have an exciting life full of many awkward adventures! In my spare time I love to creep in windows and go Facebook stalking.... ok I am totally kidding about that... or am I?... Anyways for now let's just say that my name is Kel. I am pretty much the coolest guy that will ever be writing on this blog (because I am the only guy writing on this blog) so hopefully I can provide some comic relief from a male perspective as well! Anyways thank you for reading and I hope that you enjoy our many great adventures!
Kel
A little about Bangles
Hey Y'all!!! Bangles here. yes Bangles. you will learn to love my name and hopefully me! I am the typical blonde. Somethings about me, i love chocolate, camping, hiking, singing, dancing, Liam Payne and Sandwiches. I work at a local sandwich shop which keeps my life interesting. I do not go to college but i do live off campus. Which is enough college experience i need. I am a very awkward person, especially around attractive boys, for example Margo, Bindi and I went to starbucks the other morning, the attractive cashier was talking to us appologizing about the wait. Confidently i said " it's allllll goooooood." while waving some kind of gang sign over my face. yes. i did that. why am i single?? oh wait! thats why!
Lots of Love!
Bangles!
Lots of Love!
Bangles!
itttt's margoooooo!
I'm a peach, simple as that. My favorite things include, Norway, overalls, flower crowns, Forever 21, Harry Edward Styles, bromances, Finnick Odair, sleep, film, hot chocolate, and politics. I'm a student, as Bindi, Elementary Education is my subject as children are the only living beings I can speak to. Yep. Well I'm generally a chipper person, and I love to have fun. So, hire me.
Well that was awkward, Yours truly,
Margo. xox
I'm a peach, simple as that. My favorite things include, Norway, overalls, flower crowns, Forever 21, Harry Edward Styles, bromances, Finnick Odair, sleep, film, hot chocolate, and politics. I'm a student, as Bindi, Elementary Education is my subject as children are the only living beings I can speak to. Yep. Well I'm generally a chipper person, and I love to have fun. So, hire me.
Well that was awkward, Yours truly,
Margo. xox
Meeting Bindi!
Bindi here!
I'm a short, sassy redhead who is obsessed with Harry Potter, chocolate, Disney movies, bigfoot, character cups, animals and cute boys! I'm a university student, studying Wildlife science (but stay tuned, my major has changed 3 times in 2 years so nothing is set in stone yet!) and I'm loving life! However I seem to have been born with no knowledge of how to communicate with other human beings, especially those of the male persuasion. I understand dogs more than most people. Yup. Dogs. That's my life, dogs are my future. Like a crazy cat lady but better.
For instance, my first week at my college: I'm a transfer student, new to campus and I'm just trying not to get stepped on (I am that short!). I'm leaving one of the buildings and clearly not paying attention to my surroundings as I open a door right into the face of one of the cutest boys I have ever seen. Seriously this guy was a babe and I hit him with a door! Now when I tell this story most people naturally assume that I would have then said something clever and witty and gotten his number. How wrong they were. I am neither clever nor witty. I immediately yell "SORRY!" at the poor boy and ran. Now I never run, ever, unless I hit a cute guy with a door and my only thought is to get away as soon as humanly possible. Let's just say that the overall experience was... awkward!
Dearly yours, Bindi.
I'm a short, sassy redhead who is obsessed with Harry Potter, chocolate, Disney movies, bigfoot, character cups, animals and cute boys! I'm a university student, studying Wildlife science (but stay tuned, my major has changed 3 times in 2 years so nothing is set in stone yet!) and I'm loving life! However I seem to have been born with no knowledge of how to communicate with other human beings, especially those of the male persuasion. I understand dogs more than most people. Yup. Dogs. That's my life, dogs are my future. Like a crazy cat lady but better.
For instance, my first week at my college: I'm a transfer student, new to campus and I'm just trying not to get stepped on (I am that short!). I'm leaving one of the buildings and clearly not paying attention to my surroundings as I open a door right into the face of one of the cutest boys I have ever seen. Seriously this guy was a babe and I hit him with a door! Now when I tell this story most people naturally assume that I would have then said something clever and witty and gotten his number. How wrong they were. I am neither clever nor witty. I immediately yell "SORRY!" at the poor boy and ran. Now I never run, ever, unless I hit a cute guy with a door and my only thought is to get away as soon as humanly possible. Let's just say that the overall experience was... awkward!
Dearly yours, Bindi.
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